26th day – Hope and despair


Thank you Marlene Ferron for the translation.

Morning red alert

Shabbat, 6:00 am, Tel Aviv and I sleep deeply. The red alert pulls us from our sleep with difficulty. And here we are in the stairwell. I exchange a few incoherent sentences with depressed neighbors. After this awakening with fanfare, I find it hard to get back to sleep but eventually I do fall asleep again and even lay in bed for a while. A Shabbat morning!
The artist Merav Shinn Ben-Alon made a drawing from a photo of me that Sarah had taken in our stairwell during an alert. She has quite captured my state of mind at that time.


The sea, whatever happens

We’ll swim up to the rocks. Calm sea, clear water, perfect water temperature. This could be paradise but we wonder if, in case of emergency, we would have time to reach a shelter. Certainly not.

Towards the end?

We learn that the Israeli security cabinet will no longer try to negotiate a cease-fire with the Hamas but the IDF will withdraw unilaterally after it has destroyed all the tunnels, but will respond to each attack.

Hope and despair

Esther organized to mark the 30th anniversary of the death of her husband, Jonathan Merzer, a group study at her home. She marks the time during the period of nine days of Tisha B’Av, during the period of disasters, before the coming of the consolation. She reads verses from the Vision of Isaiah. She speaks of these last days when hope succeeds despair, from despair to hope, and when often one feels, at the same time, hope and despair. One of her favorite quotes is a quote from Yoram Kaniuk, who said that Israel « is still alive between the massacre and the picnic. »
I never met Jonathan, Esther’s husband but she was able to make his souvenir present, and I feel I have known him, a little. She evokes the blue of his eyes. His friends draw the portrait of a man of the theater, lively, energetic and happy. A happy saltimbanque.

We talk about the war. How else? We think of of Hadar Goldin’s fate. His parents, his sister, his twin brother, his fiancee spoke during the News Bulletin to ask the government not to give up. It is poignant.

And this morning, I learned that he was pronounced dead last night, that there were enough evidence to declare him dead; I write this and I do not understand what I write, that the family request from all those who can to come to the funeral to be held tonight at 5:30 p.m. at the military cemetery of Kfar Saba.

The pain can not be measured with commas

I think again of Yoram Kaniuk in his book, The Last Jew:

« Today, I know that which is written must be written despite the grammar and not because of it. Menahem died at all times and in all modes, the pain can not be measured with commas »

Israel : Day 46 and 47 – One little boy with the colors of Argentina 

Israel : Day 44 and 45 – The war of attrition

Israel : Day 42 and 43 – Here we go again

Israel – Day 27 – In the open air

Israel – Day 26 – Hope and despair

Israel – Day 22 – Fatigue and Loneliness

Israel: Day 17 – Art and kindness, despite everything